23.10.2007 (Tuesday)

I finally confronted him...
This should put a fullstop to all my doubts that I had for the past few weeks.. I always thought meeting up once a week is not alot to ask for and I have given him alot of breathing space but i was wrong. He told me that life should not be centered just among the two of us. I do understand that. He say he need to have his own time. But have i ever stop him from having his own activities? No I did not. Then why? He says he is afraid of letting me down, not able to marry me...etc. I asked him if his feelings has changed. He denied. Yeah... he answered my questions but still no conclusions.

What the hell does he wants?


20.10.2007 - 22.10.2007

Happy Birthday To Me!!!

First birthday greeting is from Deardear. He dug out a bag of stuff from his drawer and gave it to me. Not much surprise cause it is a robinson plastic bag and i could guess as much what is inside. It is a whole set of perfume with lotion and shower gel. Then he surprised me with a jumbo birthday card in a shape of a bear. Special part of the card is, he made a mini card tied with a ribbon onto the paw of the bear. It is an invitation card to a 3D2N stay at Downtown East chalet with a list of programs during the stay written by him..

So... Here we go for our short getaway..
I wasn't excited at all cause we are going through the down period of our relationship. All I feel is that he did it for the sake of doing. These 3 days passes slow... we were like doing our own individual things at the chalet except for the part that we went to the arcade and play basketball, the wild wild wet. No doubt we had fun but the feeling was low. I had to even remind him to blow the candles, sing a birthday song for me before the clock strikes twelve. He didn't even bother to take any pictures which I am quite particular about this. Sighhhhhh... This is the 2nd birthday which i feel sucky.